One day recently, bored at my computer and easily distracted while using Google Maps, I zoomed way out and then zoomed back in, at random, to see what random geographical feature might be worth exploring. While poking around the US/Canada border, I stumbled upon some beautiful scenery, and I wanted to share my journey of discovery with all of you.
First, I saw a little town that caught my eye.
“Gravenhurst,” huh? Was it known, back in the 1800s, as the town where you’d go to purchase a grave? Are there cemeteries strewn about Canada filled with old tombstones produced in Gravenhurst? Is there a museum in Gravenhurst dedicated to the history and/or art of producing graves? Is it less of a museum and more of a theme park? Are there grave-based rides? Can I possibly determine this fact from an aerial photograph? Let’s find out.
Those are certainly some interestingly-shaped lakes. Why so long and skinny? Were they cut by a retreating glacier? They’re too irregular to be man-made, for sure. If I zoom in, will I be able to tell? Will I see a sign announcing “75 miles to Gravenhurst Grave Museum and Go-Kart Track”? Better go see.
Frank Miller Memorial Route. Good comics. Did 300, I think. Didn’t know he died. Now, why is Loon Lake the only lake to get a name worth showing at this zoom scale? Don’t they call money “Loonies” up there? I bet it’s beautiful. Probably no way to tell from Google Maps, though. No way there’d be Street View. Not this far from civilization.
A photo sphere! Even better. Let’s see this “Loon Lake.”
Oh, it is pretty. Should I retire to a place like this someday? Could I do that? Mentally and financially, that is? Too far away to worry about, now, but it’s pretty. Maybe I’ll buy the house in the photo. That’d be a good story. “Yep, I saw this house as about 13 pixels in a photosphere 30 years ago, and knew I’d own it, one day.” It’s not even in Gravenhurst, near the go kart track. It’s in West Gravenhurst. With the exchange rate, there’s no way a lake house costs more than $7,000, American. It’s in the woods in Canada, for God’s sake.
And everybody’s got kayaks, and the trees are nice. I bet my neighbors would be cool. Very relaxed. Nothing to get upset about when you’re relaxing on a kayak in the middle of Loon Lake.
And the houses aren’t right on the water, but they’re uphill, a bit. That makes sense; less likely to flood. Am I on shore right now, or am I standing on a dock? Let’s turn around and see!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH WHY IS IT HOLDING A SANDWICH IF IT DOESN’T EVEN HAVE A HEAD