There are 84 bracket entries in the #WorstSongBracket, so expertly crafted by notsomethingstructural and rhythm method. As of this writing, I am ahead of only 8 of them. Mind you, this was on my second chance ballot, the one on which I retroactively changed the votes I’d already lost.

What does this tell us about me and about popular music since 1990? Here are some choices:

  • Kids today!
  • I have no taste.
  • When in doubt, people vote chalk.
  • I should have listened to all the songs before voting.

Of the 68 songs that made it through the regular season to make it to May Blandness, each is secretly or overtly liked or tolerated by at least a few of us. What are the five songs that would have been left out if you were the commissioner? Say what you want to say and let the words fall out. Honestly I want to see you be brave.

Advertisement

Advertisement

For my own choices I didn’t do much analysis. My criteria were “Did this song once upon a time make me move, laugh, cry, think, or smile?”, and “Would I instinctively reach for the dial if this song came on the car radio?”

Old Beige Five

1. She Hates Me - Puddle of Mudd

Advertisement

2. Crazy Bit*h - Buckcherry

3. One Week - Barenaked Ladies

Advertisement

4. Truly Madly Deeply - Savage Garden

5. 100 Years - Five For Fighting

Old Beige Tolerable Ten

These are ten others I considered before choosing my five.

Advertisement

Advertisement

1. Pretty Fly (For A White Guy) - The Offspring

2. Stressed Out - twenty one pilots

3. Thrift Shop - Macklemore & Ryan Lewis

Advertisement

4. Wild Wild West - Will Smith

5. Allstar - Smash Mouth

Advertisement

6. Walking In Memphis - Marc Cohn

Advertisement

7. Space Between - Dave Matthews

8. Hey There Delilah - Plain White T’s

9. Ice Ice Baby - Vanilla Ice

Advertisement

10. Follow Me - Uncle Kracker