Fake Plastic Trees is a redoubtable song by a revolutionary band, but I'm hard-pressed to put its meaning into mere words. I'm mortal for chrissakes. And Thom Yorke is, uhh, Thom Yorke. Which is to say that Elton John wrote a song about him. Pretty sure about that last thing. Now that we've got that out of the way, I've managed a way to illustrate the exact meaning of this Radiohead classic.

A green plastic watering can

For a fake Chinese rubber plant

In the fake plastic earth

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That she bought from a rubber man

In a town full of rubber plans

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To get rid of itself

It wears her out, it wears her out

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It wears her out, it wears her out

She lives with a broken man

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A cracked polystyrene man

Who just crumbles and burns

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He used to do surgery

For girls in the eighties

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But gravity always wins

And it wears him out, it wears him out

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It wears him out, it wears

She looks like the real thing

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She tastes like the real thing

My fake plastic love

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But I can't help the feeling

I could blow through the ceiling

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If I just turn and run

And it wears me out, it wears me out

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It wears me out, it wears me out

And if I could be who you wanted

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If I could be who you wanted

All the time, all the time

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As our pictorial journey into the mind of one Thom Yorke concludes, I hope you can sleep tonight.