An occasional feature highlighting the wackiest conversations found in the wild unregulated hinterland of Deadspin's Pending Submissions.
From the Leaked Wonderlic Scores post. Meet JobuNeedsARefill86. Once, many Deadspins ago, you knew JobuNeedsARefill86 as Jobu81, and in all likelihood you hated him then just as much as you are about to hate him now. Why? Let's see:
"It's aggressively unrelated to football. It's embarrassing for players"
I'm sorry, isn't that the entire point of Deadspin?
Do we need to link to every article that you guys have posted that is "aggressively unrelated" to sports or is "embarrassing for players"?
Honestly, I'm curious if you genuinely believe you have a leg to stand on here... Today 2:59pm
Wait . . . Jobu . . . I'm not sure you're . . . oh, I've interrupted. Please, do go on.
Also, "It exists to make fans and reporters feel superior"
I mean, really, you don't see this as a little bit "Pot/Kettle"? Today 3:00pm
Huh? I'm not sure I understand just what's going on here. Something about pots calling Wonderlic tests black. This is all very confusing. Let's throw it to the audience. Anyone? Anyone? Yes, somidscr21, I see you'd like to shed some light on this. Yes?
This is a blog. Mostly dealing with sports. At times they discuss other topics that interest them and their readers. This blog is not required reading.
On the other side of the coin, the Wonderlic is a test given by the NFL as a precursor to allowing the players into the league. It's required they take them to do their jobs, even though it is not related.
Do you really think your argument has a leg to stand on? Today 3:05pm
Okay, yeah! A little snarky there at the end, but yeah! Clarification. Wonderlic: a dubious test given to NFL prospects; and Deadspin: a blog on the internet. Surely, that settles it. Unless . . . YoureRealDawg, you'd like to weigh in?
He wasn't arguing for the Wonderlic, he was saying that gossiping about the Wonderlic scores should be right up Deadspin's alley. And I agree. Today 3:10pm
Wait . . . wait. We seem to be back in the mud, guys. I thought the post was about how the Wonderlic test is stupid and pointless. In times like these, we need a voice of reason. Meet RAF Captain Pott Scarker:
I'm confused why you're comparing Deadspin to the Wonderlic test. Does the NFL make draftees read Deadspin or something? Today 3:33pm
There it is. Cutting right through the confusion like a knife through something confusing but also cuttable. Perfectly reasonable. Surely, this will be an opportunity for Jobu to clear things up, to get us back on track once and for all. Jobu?
??? I'm not comparing Deadspin to the Wonderlic...
Yes you are.
I'm saying that Deadspin, Home to FavrePic, Funbag, HookupStories and Virgil bag, probably isn't the right one to call out a writer for things that are "aggressively not related to sports" and "embarrassing to athletes" 46 minutes ago
But that's not what has happened. You see, where you're getting confused is . . . yes, okay, go on . . .
Let's be clear,
I love Deadspin.
I've been here since Day 1.
And we are only too aware, friend.
They just have no right to callout someone for writing that is "aggressively not related to sports" and "embarrassing to players"
No, Jobu, dammit, list-
That kind of hypocrisy is bullshit.44 minutes ago
If Eric Clapton complained about his friend who bought ridiculous expensive cars, yes, that would be similar. 40 minutes ago
Oh. So you're an insane person. RAF Captain Pott Scarker, bring the justice on this fool.
The post says :
And here's where we rundown the list of reasons the Wonderlic is a bad idea. It doesn't predict future performance. It's aggressively unrelated to football. It's embarrassing for players....
It's criticizing the test for having those aspects. And the reason the criticism is pertinent is that the NFL compels the test's use in evaluating draftees. Why is a criticism applicable to the Wonderlic also relevant in assessing Deadspin, a sports-themed entertainment blog? 38 minutes ago
Way to go! I feel confident that this particular approach will appeal to any reasonable not-insane person. Jobu, here's your big chance. Hear reason, my friend. Come back to the pack. Come back to us.
It's splitting hairs at this point,
but the post is about the writer choosing to write about the Wonderlic, just as my comment was about what Deadspin chooses to write about.
Yes, but . . . but no. No!
Rex Ryan's tattoo and sexual proclivities are presumably less relevant to his coaching than the Wonderlic is to a players ability, but it's entertaining. And I'm good with that. (It's actually why I've been a reader since Day 1).
It's when they call out other writers that that hypocrisy bleeds out. And that's some shit that warrants calling out.
Something tells me this is not the dude of empathy. This is another dude altogether.
This was mostly a jab at Deadspin. If you feel that you're 100% right, and that I'm an idiot that doesn't understand the world, and superior to me and what not, good on you. 30 minutes ago
You hear that, RAF Captain Pott Scarker? Good on you. And may I add, good on all of us, for surely we have seen the end of JobuNeedsARefill86 in this particular discussion. What's that, DjangoUnchainedMelody? You have something you'd like to say to Jobu?
Deadspin isn't used to measure the ability of soon to be NFL players. It's a tongue-in-cheek blog about mostly sports and some other shit that the writers find interesting. You are holding two things to the same standards that aren't even in the same time zone of similarity. So, yeah, you are comparing Deadspin to the Wonderlic.
It's like criticizing John Stewart for not acting more like a politician. Today 4:56pm
Yeah, I think we've kinda covered this ground already, but thanks for -
Judging from your name and that response, I have to assume you're off your meds.Today 4:58pm
Well, yes, I think we can reasonably infer that Jobu is not currently using his prescribed anti-psychotic medications. Care to confirm or deny, Jobu?
Oh, so sports bloggers aren't sports writers? I'm sure the Deadspin guys would love to hear that...
So that's a yes.
Basically, I'm saying they can't have it both ways.
"It" being the Tuna Two Ways, because the restaurant is out of the sashimi-grade.
If they want to be taken seriously on stuff like the Manti Teo thing, the Manny Steroids thing and the many other legit news stuff they've admirably done (which I assume they do), while at the same time posting pictures of athletes's dicks and offering rumors of a player's crazy night out (which is admittedly entertaining), they don't get the right to call out another author for posting Wonderlic scores.
Jobu has now declared himself the Official Arbiter of What Is Allowed. Which gives him significant standing in this particular conversation.
(especially under the guise that Wonderlic scores are irrelevant to sports and embarrassing to the player. Surely dong pics and stories of drunken nights out are less relevant and more embarrasing to a player)Today 5:07pm
You know what, Jobu? Your [w]hatever, dudes are totally worthless. I understood that to mean you had moved on from this conversation. Please give a less ambiguous indication of your too-coolness in the future, will you?
A final retort, RAF Captain Pott Scarker?
Call your basic reading comprehension error "splitting hairs" if you wish. In any event your attempt to call out the writer's supposed hypocrisy is utterly misconceived, as others have explained. 59 minutes ago
Translation: shoryuken! Eat it, Jobu.
It's not Deadspin and the Wonderlic.
Yes it is.
It's Deadspin and Bob McGinn.
Stories about the Wonderlic and stories about Dong Pics.
No no no! You must stop this at once!
Deadspin chooses what it writes about, like Bob McGinn chooses what he writes about.
Wonderlic scores are interesting, like John Salley stories were interesting
Ok, with this, I'm out.
Okay. Here we have an unambiguous retreat. I think that's called for. We will all agree to disagree with the notion that Jobu is a rational person with a properly functioning frontal lobe. While we may not have achieved satisfaction with the outcome of our conversation, we can at least . . . [ahem]
If you choose to narrowly define my viewpoint so you can feel like I'm an idiot and superior to me, go ahead. 49 minutes ago
Yes, we can very easily experience the latter (unless that paradox was intentional, in which case: whoa) without bothering to ever engage in any of the former, thank you very much. Now, we wouldn't want to keep you any longer, so I will bid you -
I'm not surprised, just pointing out a hypocrisy
I will boldly
Please say "go where no man has gone before", then jump in an interstellar spacecraft and hit the warp drive. Please.
however that if this McGinn guy and no one in the mainstream media acquired then posted Wonderlic scores and Deadspin got a hold of 'em, Deadspin would be the ones posting Wonderlic scores and pointing out the borderline illiterate "college graduates" (and we'd love them for it) 6 minutes ago
. . . ?
Then it's settled! Pots, Wonderlic scores, Eric Clapton, John Salley, something about John Stewart . . . all these things sure do exist! I would personally like to thank all involved for illuminating these and probably other things. It's been a wonderful treat for everyone.