A Bad Place Full Of Bad Jerks

Today is it. One more poll, one more update. One more reminder that the fate of these two songs lies in your hands. And one more back and forth between your two hosts as the sun sets on the great “Worst Song Bracket” experiment. We’re running this one for 2 days.

RM: So I am very happy with this matchup. I think the voters picked an intriguing pair of songs to finish strong on. In addition, having a #1 seed vesus a #2 seed is a strong vindication of our seeding, if I do say so myself!


nss: Yeah overall I think we did pretty well. Let’s look at the Tainted 8 - we had just two double-digit seeds who went that far. That ain’t bad considering this bracket really had a ridiculous number of candidates that could have gone the distance.

RM: “Achy Breaky Heart” and “Hey, Soul Sister.” Yes, I have heard before we ranked these too low.

nss: Ironically, I was both the one who nominated “Achy Breaky” and the reason it was seeded so low.

Dude, the Spanish version has been played at every Mexican Wedding or Quince I have been to. Everyone did the line dance too, it’s quite popular.


I get that impression. Anyways, I do think the voters did a good job of picking the worse songs to advance. There really weren’t many “upsets” by my count. Obviously, we know one, but aside from that the rest could be justified, at least I think.

Yeah I think “Nookie” is worse than “Photograph” but not by much and I have little complaints there. I thought “Summer Girls” had a chance to upset “My Humps” but I was clearly underestimating the Anti-BEP contingent of our voters.


Honestly, coming into this, I didn’t expect to find either of these two songs this late in the tournament. Hoobastank, Bizkit, Nickelback, Aerosmith, Baha Men... these weren’t just bad songs, they were iconic in both badness and irritation factor.

But the thing that’s good: both of these songs *are* extremely, extremely bad. I am sure “Cruise” got a boost from representing the birth of Bro-Country as I am sure “My Humps” did from being by BEP, but still: these are worse songs than almost all of the ones I just mentioned.


Yeah I mean auto-tune and country together? Hank Williams is rolling over in his grave, man. When we started getting nominations I think 4 different Black Eyed Peas Songs were mentioned. Yeesh.

At least. They were probably tied with Will Smith for most potential entries.

The thing about Will Smith is there was also not even an agreement of every song mentioned being bad. I think everyone agrees all of BEP is bad


Good point. Who did you expect to see here? If you did a bracket, who were your finalists?

I am 38th out of 84th. I had FGL winning the whole thing against Nookie in the championship, along with Creed and “My Humps” to round it out.


Damn, I’m back at 45. I don’t remember my Foul Four, but I had Hoobastank over Nickelback and felt good about it. Nickelback losing to BEP I wouldn’t call an upset, but I was definitely surprised. If FGL pulls it off you could easily end up in the top 10, that’s pretty impressive.

8 other people picked it as a winner, only two of which are ahead of me.

What’s really amazing about the bracket challenge is “Ex-Scientologists Hate Cruise Less” has a shot to have a perfect Foul Four, which is fucking incredible.


That is quite impressive

A total of 4 of 84 people had 3 of the Foul Four. That’s discounting “also picked the champ and both finalists.” Hell, I believe “Ex-Scientologists” had 8 of 8 as well. That’s absolutely unbelievable.


Speaking of voters, we have had a lot of people reach out to us and tell us they were sort of sad it was coming to an end. That’s impressive. It feels like we’ve been doing this forever, but I think like we did a fair enough job keeping it fresh

A lot of people also are like “what’s your next project?” and it’s like buddy, I have no clue, and i never even thought of myself as a #content creator. In a sense, I guess we are content creators, we just haven’t earned a single $1 for it. HA!


I’m looking forward to another project down the road but right now I’m really fired up to finish some of the actual work that they pay me money for, get some sleep, and finally mop my damn floors. Maybe close to a year off, which will go by fast between the nomination process and all. Plus I’m going to finally finish my hip hop list. And that’s tentatively scheduled to get another, second, top secret step after that.

But I do like the idea of “worst Christmas song” and “worst artist/band” A LOT. Those would both be a lot of fun.


I also love the other bracket ideas too. Christmas wouldn’t be something we could do for 5-6 months though

A 6 month layoff before the Christmas bracket might be good. I assume Kinja will still exist through 2016 but who knows if it’s a safe bet to make it ‘till December 2017.


So if you had to change one thing on the bracket, excluding the Train seeding, what would it be? It could be schedule, divisions, something about a particular song...? This was your brainchild, so let’s start with you.

Well I am going to take this two ways: the first would obviously be the 4 week nearly everyday jury duty that sort of limited my daily participation in this whole process. The second thing I would have changed was publishing under “Worst Song Bracket” and using embedded polls from the outset. What about you NSS?


I totally agree we should have had our ducks in a row on that first Friday, but lesson learned and we ended up with a great set of voters who made this a lot of fun. I actually go back and forth on whether we were better off with the embedded polls or Twitter but agree with you on the dedicated account.

For my thing - honestly, as a stickler for details, if everyone is voting for “Worst Band” anyways, I almost wish we did that. Though, that would certainly have left a number of one-hit wonders behind, like “Cruise” and “Achy Breaky Heart” which was one of the matches I was looking forward to most. Doing it by year instead of genre would have been interesting too. So I really don’t know! This turned out good on its own.


The thing about picking songs is that you can actually compare the two songs together. I really like the band/artist idea but in that scenario I think you leave voting up longer to let people listen to several songs before making a choice

That’s a good point. Maybe 2 day polls. At least in the beginning.

So what is your biggest takeaway from this project?

That my taste in bad music was questionable, though not nearly as questionable as OldBeigeGuy’s. Mainly I was surprised at the outrage over Train. They never struck me as a more egregious band than many others at the time, yet voters had a vitriol that was completely unparalleled. Even Miss nss put it succinctly; “Fuck Train.”


If I had to say mine I think there is just something inherently fun talking about the WORST songs versus the BEST can actually be more fun and garner more conversation. Why talk about the best stuff? So much more FUN to decide what is worse

Chid said it well while we were working on that guest contribution, it’s extremely hard to write about music (Chid if you’re still reading, I do plan to reply to that email!). There’s something about bad music where you just can’t take it seriously enough to defend a difference of opinion. There’s no use in getting mad online. Plus it’s a little easier to poke holes in and harass.


The other biggest surprise / takeaway for me is that the community that formed around this has really been great. There were a lot of commenters that came from different backgrounds and it’s been a lot of fun seeing everyone co-mingle. Believe it or not, I first got involved in this because I was the new guy on Twitter and hadn’t yet found my footing. I’m extremely glad I did because I got to meet so many new people as a result. And they’ve all been great.

So, thanks for letting me chip in and be a part of all the fun.

Yeah having you as the EIC was great. I had an idea but you had a lot of know how and insight that really helped this thing go. I also met a few people who I talk to on Twitter that I didn’t before. I hope that community continues to grow and I encourage others to do these type of projects.


Yeah, I used to talk with this guy jeffvantweety. Whatever happened to that guy? But it bears reminding that Sidespin was made for people to use, and as seemingly both the newest and only writer there, it’s still a good community. A lot of the, uh, let’s call it “barriers to entry” have been largely eliminated. And with all that I’ve contributed there, fortunately the bar is low and all it usually takes is a quick email or DM to get permission to post. Or write something and one of the two of us can share it. It’s a lot of work, but people appreciate it and the internet friendships you make will last you, well, for the duration of your project when you’re then promptly forgotten.

Yeah I am hoping our followers/voters engage us on Twitter or elsewhere. It’s just fun, that’s why we are doing this.


Absolutely. I added a lot of people, and now I’m gonna be sure to go back through my roster to add a few more. OK, one more question before you really have no reason to ever talk to me again: What would you have had for your dream finals matchup. No need to rationalize, let’s hear it.

Honestly, it would have been “Nookie” versus “Cruise (remix)“ both of these songs just seem like utter train wrecks to me.


“The Reason” against “Fuck It.” Because in a vacuum, I think those may have been those may have been the actual worst.

Anyways, that’s a wrap, guess I’ll catch you next year amigo.

Well man, thanks again man for all you’ve done to help this thing go. It was an awesome experience, and let’s work together on something down the road. Go get some sleep, it’s almost morning over there.


It’s late. I can’t wait to sleep now that we’ve finished this out all the way (you’re welcome fans.) It’s really been a lot of fun though. Thanks for having me join and thanks to all the voters for all the support that made this all worth doing. We’ll be back.

Note: This poll runs for 2 days, and closes at 2PM on Friday.


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Twitter Discussion

This post will update daily until the completion of the bracket.

Thank You’s: Thank you all our “esteemed” guest hosts, to those who submitted nominees, playlists, Gerse for hosting the bracket challenge (linked), @blairdow for designing our Twitter logo, Sidespin for TKTKTK, and the staff at Deadspin for your tireless efforts.

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