Freeman McNeil: So what are you doing now that Gawker has shut down?
Jordan Sargent: Drinking lattes, watching Italian cinema, dabbling in perfumes.
FMcN: Would you consider yourself a religious man?
JS: I don’t like my messiahs so, ugh... martyred.
FMcN: Any hobbies? Do you play sports?
JS: Ew, I’d like sports if nobody else was there and we didn’t have to compete.
FMcN: I hear you play the harp.
JS: I did, right up until you just mentioned it right now.
FMcN: I have this kitten. I would like to give it to you because it’s so cuddly and cute.
JS: Kittens are so 1998. It’s Ocelots or nothing. Now it’s not even Ocelots. I’ve moved on to Jaguarundis.
FMcN: Ok... so if I come across a Jaguarun...
JS: NOPE! It’s Kodkods now.
FMcN: Have you watched Stranger Things yet?
JS: Everyone knows that television reached its apex with Unsolved Mysteries. Duh.
FMcN: Ok, so I’d like to say thank you for sitting down with me today.
JS: I’m not sitting.
FMcN: Ok, so I’d like to say thank yo...
JS: (turns around, leaves while typing furiously on Blackberry)
*not an actual interview