A Bad Place Full Of Bad Jerks

Outer Space, Part III: What Came Before The Big Bang?

This is the third and final installment of my series about Space. First, I wrote about how incredibly big space is. The second article discussed how space never seems to end and how it keeps expanding. This article will explain to you, gentle reader, what Space was before it was Space. You must come to grips with the fact that this article will absolutely melt your brain and you will question your very existence.

Space, as I have previously discussed, keeps expanding. It goes on expanding so long as there isn’t anything there to stop it. So what was there before Space? That’s easy - particles and antiparticles. Quantum effects keep producing particles and antiparticles all the time. Particles and antiparticles are constantly produced, and subatomic processes continue to influence quarks and leptons which are considered the building blocks of the smallest units of matter.


So before what we now know as Space was bigly-banged in the Big Bang, we had these small subatomic particles, antiparticles, leptons, and quarks just banging into each other. Finally they combined in the right manner and under the right circumstances to create the Big Bang and here we are today.

The most important thing to remember in all this is that the word “quark” is pretty awesome. It is possibly one of the finest one-syllable words in any known language. The one-syllable greatness of quark reminds me of the song “Monosyllabic Girl” by the seminal Los Angeles punk band NOFX:

So there you have it, the final piece in the critically acclaimed series of articles about Space. If you are an educator, no matter at what level, feel free to share this with your students. They will automatically become valedictorians and get early entry into all universities, including MIT, Berkeley, Harvard, Stanford, and even Ball State (heh heh heh).

Space - it’s pretty fucking awesome.

Share This Story