It's awards season, or whatever.
In 4th place, winner of a handsome participation ribbon and a firm handshake:
Buster Douglas News, Then And Now, by ComingFromInsideTheHouse
Maybe not such a good idea to announce the probable suckiness of your post in response to a challenge for good posts. Still, thanks for participating, my man.
In 3rd place, winner of a handful of orange plastic ballpoint click pens (lightly used):
Objects Which Are Currently On My Desk, Ranked, by Mangini In A Bottle
Truly, there is no one more qualified to rank the items on your desk than you are. People forget that.
In 2nd place, winner of a bag of lozenges, a handful of orange plastic ballpoint click pens (lightly used), one clipboard, and me flipping you the double-bird:
The Incorrect Non-statements to Simliar Non-Queries, by lynnhoppes
Burn in hell, asshole.
And in 1st place, winner of one copy of Amazing Experiences magazine/travel catalogue, which is actually a promotional handout from a local travel agency, but does have some lovely pictures of faraway places, plus a bag of lozenges, a handful of orange plastic ballpoint click pens (lightly used), one clipboard, and a firm handshake:
The Adventures of Puddles, the Amazing Submarine Puppy, by Milo Minderbinder
I'm still not entirely sure what to make of this, but since it completely towers over all other submissions in terms of effort, it is the runaway winner.
Enjoy your prizes!