1. Fence : You ever dig a post hole? It's Miserable
2. New York: Your headlines aren't that funny.
3. Cereal: These are the idiots that brought you Raisin Bran, which combines all the joy of rotten grapes with tasteless fiber
4. Washington: Norm Chad
5. Denver: [intentionally left blank]
6. US: Thanks for destroying another Christmas gift delivered 3 weeks late. Here's to you getting rain and sleet and snow all at the same time for a year.
7. It: Oh joy, manual Twitter. I hope you get my witty comeback in the mail in three weeks.
8. Lamp: I'm not fucking climbing way up there to change a bulb, asshole.
9. Sidespin: Full of jerks, idiots, photoshop, and listicles